A lot of you know, that we have had the desire to foster/adopt children for quite some time. I have always wanted to adopt in addition to having my own child. Then you add a less-than-fun pregnancy to the mix and it was 100% sure(for me) that this was going to be our next step. Dave has become more and more excited as time has gone on, and I have made it clear that I do not plan to birth anymore children anytime soon (unless Dave would like to have the next one…hehe).
Why are we choosing foster care? Well there are several pluses to choosing this method as a way to expand your family. While I will say foster care is not for everyone, I would also say, it would be great for a lot of families. So many little children are ripped from their homes and placed in group homes or shelters if there are no foster homes available. This is currently happening in South Carolina. The need is great!!
Here are some of the questions I have received when telling people about our plan to get licensed as a foster family.
Q: Do you want to adopt or just foster?
A: We would prefer to adopt as soon as possible and then re-evaluate after we get adjusted to life as a family of 4. We may be open to only fostering kids on a short term basis after we feel our family is complete with its permanent family members.
Q: Why did you not choose the private adoption method?
A: For us, there were a lot of factors that didn’t seem to make that a great fit for our family. It takes so much time(up to 2 years), to get a child once you start the process of private adoption. For foster care, it can take about 3 months from start to finish. We do not have a strong desire to adopt outside of the country (at this point in time), so the foster care system seemed like the perfect fit. You are able to meet the child and bond with them before any final adoption takes place. And the government does not require that you pay any money while fostering them (they actually cover the child’s expenses every month while in foster care).
Q: What age are you wanting to foster/adopt?
A: Right now we are open to one child ages baby-3 years old. We will consider siblings, so we will see what the Lord blesses us with.
Q: When will you be receiving your first placement?
A: We are in the middle of the process currently, with 2 classes to finish, our DHEC and Fire inspections, and home-study left. Our application will then be sent to Columbia, SC to be approved. Since there are so many children waiting for foster homes -devastating- we anticipate that we will receive our first child in the following few days after the application gets signed. The plan is for that to be in the middle of September.
Q: Will you be guaranteed to adopt the first child placed in your home?
A: No. In the foster system nothing is a guarantee. While the case worker may have a pretty good idea that the child may never return to their parents, it is a long process with many court dates and hurdles to jump before anyone can know for sure. If the parental rights are terminated, we will have first dibs to adopt them.
Q: Do you prefer a boy or a girl?
A: Well…I change my mind every other minute on that. We are open to either gender. I would secretly maybe prefer a boy because I have kept every last clothing and baby item from Graham (mostly out of fear that if I gave them away I will get pregnant again- it happens!). But I will say, that when I see tutu’s and a certain purple butterfly baby mobile on Pinterest (see picture below), that my hearts kind of gets a little excited. We shall see.
Have I forgotten any major things?
I plan to take a short “maternity leave” from work when we receive our first child. The age will determine that length of time. It may be a week or 4 weeks (if I am up all night with a newborn), who knows. I will keep you all in the know but I think we all know that I can’t stay away from work too long. 🙂
I bought a crib today. Because everyone needs an excuse to buy a new-ish crib, right?
I will say I enjoy this process much more than I enjoyed throwing up in a toilet for months, sorry for the TMI. (but not really, lol)
Please pray that we will all have a smooth transition adjusting to a new baby/toddler in the house. Pray that God would give us the perfect child for our family and that we will trust the process.
Pray that we can be a blessing to whatever child enters our home, even if they can’t stay forever. That is our goal, after all, to change a child’s life for the better.
Thanks for reading and we look forward to having some exciting news (without pictures while they are still in foster care) come September. 🙂